Monday, March 2, 2009

Girl friends

Girls are different from boys.
Amazing! Really? Well naturally for obvious reasons but that set aside, are we just different biologically or is it our conditioning that creates more change/harm than good? One wonders what would happen if girls shaved their heads at an early age, boys grew their hair and each went on to play with respectively their plastic Tommy guns or Barbie dolls.

My parents told me what name they had chosen for me had I been born a boy. Frankly I’m happy I’m a girl. I don’t know what my life would have been like had I grown up like a typical boy. I think it’s a good thing I had two elder brothers as a girl. It’s beneficial to grow up with the other sex in the same household. It’s not just sensible but also educational. Whack! No YOU shut up. Like I said, it’s all good for you. Or something.
Is it true our brains are wired differently? I don’t know and probably some researcher somewhere knows the answer to that one. Point being, we behave differently because we are 1. conditioned that way and 2. Because we have a different biological makeup.

It is fascinating stuff.

I have several very good girlfriends and they seem to have the denominator of: being creative, somewhat whimsical, bright but not die hard business bitches, sensitive, insightful, honest, loyal, gorgeous, hard working, spiritual, funny and independent. Now what does that mean?

They are women who are optimistic about the future, always curious, contemplating, continually working on themselves, got their act together quite a while ago (no more boohoos), have their eye on the ball, made huge progress in their lives, have big hearts, had man trouble in the past but got over any nonsense now. They deserve the respect and love they radiate towards others.

This is saying a lot about me too. I find I have become friends with women who are strong and who work hard on their inner challenges. They know what they’re about. They don’t take any crap either. They laugh but they’re tough as old boots. People who don't know them mistakenly think they’re fragile and that they need rescuing.

We meet various people in our lives; sometimes we stay friends with them for a long period of time, sometimes it’s fairly short. The truth is that it doesn’t really matter. It’s not about the amount of friendships but the quality of it. I have changed my opinion about friendships a long time ago. I’ve always remained positive about believing in others and trusting them, seeing the best of them and what they can be. Ultimately you depend on yourself but friends make life more joyous.

It’s appreciating the moments that are shared but not depending on them being there. Support from others is wonderful but the fact you have to know how to support yourself is essential. I see gifts and support from my friends always as a bonus as I don’t expect any. I have no claims on them, nor do I like to be claimed as one that involves expectations. I think this is a healthy way.

You could say that friends reflect aspects of you, as that is how you connect with them in the first place. Parts of you are similar to theirs and vice versa. It’s like looking in the mirror sometimes.

“Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are.”

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