socially yours

Cordially yours? Nah. Socially yours!


According to maestro Mark Zuckerberg, founder of Facebook: it's not about being connected, but "what you are going to do once being connected" This means even MORE apps. Personally I think the market will increase to be flooded with apps that there will be a point where we will be "apped" out. This moment will come sooner rather then later. But that's a story for another day. For now we are all still playing.

Google+ has swept the geek world by storm. As Robert Scoble says: "How popular is Google+? Well, in less than a week I will have more followers here than I have on Facebook despite being on Facebook for more than three years."
Or: as another Google+ user tells it (Oliver Reichenstein): "User Interface Design standards have reached the level of graphic design, industry design and architecture, a level, where only user interface design professionals can discern outstanding work (Google+) from good work (Twitter) and average work (facebook)."


We are social animals. No matter how we live: exchange of thoughts and feelings is always going to be paramount. So what is going to be next? Does it matter? Well: does it matter to you?


And that is exactly it: instead of looking upon other people to provide answers as we generally tend to do: I think we will come to understand more and more that we are our own authority. As Hugh Macleod so aptly says:

I translate that to: you need to decide for yourself. At all times. CHOICE is what always matters. In everything.


You're never are going to have as much fun as the moment you know and decide that your life is. your. own. Whether you do something brilliant, stupid or whackadoodle: it's yours! How cool is that! So if you don't enjoy your life as much as you think you should: it's solely your responsibility to do something about it. Ha! Now you can't blame anyone for anything anymore. Liberating isn't it? 

Cartoons all by Gapingvoid.com

entanglement

From time to time we get entangled. In something, in someone. It happens so life can provide us with experience, which is the only thing that really teaches us.
In whatever scenario there are ALWAYS 3 options:

1. We go forward (thus getting further entangled)
2. We go back (possibly kicking but freeing ourselves)
3. We stay in the same spot.

Naturally there are circumstances where we wish to get entangled -you know the very kind I'm referring to. Then there's that situation in which we find ourselves because we were not paying enough attention. Oops. And then there are those instances we just never want to find ourselves and when we do it's something that can take years to repair.

(In my highland calf's case, he was freed after Nico had to do some chasing after him today, as the boy had literally got all tangled up in white break-fencing power wire plus some poles which he was dragging behind him across the paddock. Every moo there was observing him with some distaste and very round eyes. Lucky for him the power was never connected to said wire so all it did was hurt his pride. To his credit I am now doing a post in his fuzzy-socks honor.)

Basically what we can draw from any entanglement/involvement/attachment is this: you will always draw people to you for different reasons, and things happen. The wise and most important thing to do is:

• to know exactly what you are about as a person
• to know what your personal goals are or what the business focus is
• to know that you are the only one who can change your circumstance
• to stick to that which is right for you no matter what they say
• that you are the only one who can apply the above a,b or c

What I have learned is that whatever is said or whispered, or whatever they want you to see, that it is essential to draw your own conclusions and opinion. Don't give the power over your life or business away, you don't have to. Who said so? 

sign of the times

It can be very useful to write your way through the core values and practical aspects of your business. Finnish textile company Marimekko 's core values deeply resonated with me. 

• ethics
• genuineness and honesty
• freedom of creativity, courage and responsibility
• enthusiasm, commitment and goal orientation
• positivity, aestheticism

(They also have a fine Vision, Objectives, and Strategy - read here) 

I was talking to a friend a while ago about how we cannot change the people around us, or who we work with for that matter. What we can most certainly do is take the initiative and follow what we think is best. For my friend this meant resigning from her work as she could no longer support the way her workplace was being run. My husband is having an ethical debate at his workplace, also on behalf of his colleagues. It seems to be 'a sign of the times' for many to make new and conscious choices. A boss is no longer able to simply tell his (qualified) workers to do what they're told. Nowadays managers and leaders have to set an example, which usually means improving how they act. Naturally this creates obvious dilemmas as bosses are human. They have to inspire their work force, if they don't they will lose them. As someone put it to me: how can they expect us to do what they want, if they don't want to do the hard yards themselves, do not respect us nor our opinions and change the rules to fit their needs? The fact is de-motivated staff is dangerous territory.

Work has changed much from the perception of just earning wages that pay the mortgage to supporting some sort of cause or vision. We also have to be able to respect our bosses, the companies that give us work and our leaders. We do have a choice, and many employers don't realize this. Why stay in a situation we can change nothing about? It's a dead end. Once growth stops, it's game over. 

So, ending on a positive note: that what we can change, add upon, give our dedication to, what inspires us and fuels our passion; that we will stay true to and work very hard for. So there is good news after all. Work shouldn't be 'just' work, preferably it should be great fun and a passion to boot. What is yours?

An inspiring story about an ethical way to run a business is Bholu, read about that on my friend Lucy's website The Design Files here. 

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beating your drum (rehashed)

After having written this post I decided to rewrite it. Beating our own drum is not so much about being stubborn and not listening about what others opinions are of you, but more about refusing to accept any judgement on it and simply enjoy what you are doing. According to Joi - a lovely, professional and unique web designer with a talent for the quirky (and she is also a dear tweet friend) - did a great post on April 11 about whether to celebrate her introvertism or damn it to the stars when attending a social media conference. I thought it was great.

The weird part is that if we are not carefull we might actually care more about other opinions then our own. It's a common malpractise.

There's a lot to be said for originality, and also for continuing to beat your own drum in a positive way without annoying the crap out of others. As a matter of fact it can be quite useful to make that music but not tell too many people about it. You don't always need to. Just enjoy doing 'your own thing' whatever this may be.

And it always boils down to our attitude that determines which people we attract by the mere reactions we offer the world. I'm paying more attention to how how I feel and what I do as it seems to literally influence who I meet. Giving others power over our own assessment and gut instinct leads to self doubt. The only one who knows best what to do and how to choose is you and also how to be you. Stick with it.


(with thanks to Joi for her kick ass illustrations.)

short and sweet

I was reading Seth Godin's blog on the effects of positive and negative thinking. Really it's what we do and how, that ends up being the result of what we think. On the one hand we like to wallow occasionally but eventually we realize that nothing comes of it. Our state of mind determines our happiness and our success levels.

The fact is that even though stuff happens (or not) it's not helping to continue to mope. A lovely weekend helps to change perspective. But a few minutes can achieve the same result once we know how to. Having a rest helps too. And being dosed with vitamin A by the sun. So too is the growing necessity to keep things short and sweet. People do not have the patience anymore to listen to long stories. No wonder twitter is 140 characters.

I needed to get the goats hooves done and also needed to inoculate and drench them last weekend. It's like a work out for me, as some are not keen on pedicures so I have to chase them in a pen a bit to hold them. Picture holding a wriggling goat with one arm and shortening 4 hooves at the same time. As we do not have a goat race yet we work with what we have. It's our forte. I don't mind it but try to do the work while keeping the intelligent animals happy. The trick is to do the work decisively and quickly.

Focus and get things off the list, say what you want and treat others well, take notice of your surroundings: yes I think that'll do nicely.

Picture by Daisy Janie

Assumptions

The dangers of making assumptions is not just that we are, in fact, misinformed, but that we make up a story in our heads that is just plain inaccurate. We fill in the blanks where we should ask for more information. I have been known to do this and I know others who have done the same. It’s a human aspect that can get us in heaps and bounds, troubles and many exclamation marks.

Someone I haven’t met yet in person assumed she could pick something up from me on a Saturday. As a matter of fact I was working so I couldn’t have obliged. She didn’t wait for my answer but decided to head out to get what she wanted anyway. Therefore she made an assumption which didn’t help her. This of course can happen to the best of us. We usually call it a miscommunication.

We can get disappointed, in a panic, a state, a silly situation or in a fiery spirit just because we decided not to check with the other person whether our expectations could be met. Wars must have been fought and people died just because assumptions were made. It’s a funny world out there, but most of all inside ourselves.

What can we do to battle the assumption disease to avoid misunderstandings?
We confess and ASK. We CHECK. We get (as they say in StartTrek) a confirmative. Anything so we know we are on the same page with the other person and that we are in agreement. Does it matter why we assume in the first place? Maybe because we are: lazy to check, feel we know better, are complacent, good in procrastinating or in a hurry. It’s one of the ‘common’ things. The creeping into the scenario bits that we end up regretting later.

Wikipedia says:
"A judgment is something that is knowable, that is, an object of knowledge. It is evident if one in fact knows it. Thus "it is raining" is a judgment, which is evident for the one who knows that it is actually raining; in this case one may readily find evidence for the judgment by looking outside the window or stepping out of the house. In mathematical logic however, evidence is often not as directly observable, but rather deduced from more basic evident judgments. The process of deduction is what constitutes a proof; in other words, a judgment is evident if one has a proof for it."

Right.
So in other words: as long as you do not have evidence to support your thoughts: take the trouble of checking your theory. It makes for an easier life, no need to book a life coach or see a psychiatrist. No dr Freud chaise longue to drape yourself over. No boohoos in the night, no medicine on the bedside cabinet. No apologies to make to someone else. No confession time, no dramas.
Brilliant. Would we do it though? Hmm. Life will tell Holmes...

Providing value

I have made the decision to thoroughly change the way my website Quality Living is operated. I will turn it into an agency in 3 months opposed to keeping it as a network.

My talent is to CREATE and my time is better spend working on designs and being a creator opposed to setting up a business that is not my passion.

The following text is from Steve Pavlina, entrepreneur on VALUE.

Succeeding by Helping Others Succeed
February 19th, 2009 by Steve Pavlina
(…) How do you know if what you have to share has value? Share it first, and you’ll soon find out. If it provides value, people will tell you. If it doesn’t, people will usually ignore you. As long as you’re getting ignored, keep experimenting by trying to provide value in new and unique ways. The only limits are in your thinking. (…)

I was able to start providing value to others much more quickly because I wasn’t stuck thinking about making money. I focused on the service side. I soon figured out how to use my skills to give people what they need and want.

The most important result to track isn’t how many visitors your website is getting or how much money you’re making. Instead, figure out whether you’re actually making a difference in people’s lives. Are you helping people? Are you providing

strong value? If you’re providing genuine value, time and referrals will take care of most of your other key metrics.

Recently I was talking to a friend in the personal development field. Business-wise he and I both had record years in 2008, and we each expect 2009 to blow it away. We joked about the rest of the economy crashing down around us. Why do we feel so optimistic when so many people are nervous? Because we know that we’re providing real value to people. We know that our skills are aligned with contribution. We also have the capacity to do a lot of good for people who are financially struggling, looking for career changes, or feeling uncertain about the future.

Align your skills with what people need. Helping people grow is a service that’s in very high demand. It doesn’t matter that we’re in a (media-fueled) recession. That just means people are more keen to reduce low-value expenditures, and they’re more sensitive to spending money wisely — on purchases that provide the best bang for buck for them. If you’re providing weak value, you’re on shaky ground during a recession. But if you’re providing solid value that meets human needs, a recession can create even bigger opportunities for you — people will drop the fluff from their lives and seek you out instead.

When your business model is no longer fed by sufficient demand, you can always switch to doing something else. But if there’s one thing humanity needs right now, it’s for more of us to step it up and embrace our true potential instead of settling for the limited roles assigned by our social conditioning. In our current environment, there’s still plenty of room for more people to start businesses based on helping and encouraging others to grow. We’re a long way from being over-saturated in this area"

Helping other grow and supporting them comes naturally to me. I don't even think about it. I will continue to support others but make it a side activity, not a main priority. It's time I got back to doing more fun stuff with my husband, he deserves better. To even have time to (gasp) paint! The world is my oyster haha and I intend to have more laughs about it. You enjoy it too...