Tuesday, July 7, 2009

the moods

What is your immediate reaction when it starts to rain? When your boss tells you off? When your partner gets upset with you? Does it say a lot about you or how you react? Maybe both. We have mood swings, chocolate or beer cravings, or simply go off our rocker.

"Our brains are busy processing chemicals that internally change our moods, but find a way to rationalize those mood changes based on events (..) in the outside world. We often act as though money can buy joy, but of course, it works better when we're joyful in the first place.

We don't say, "I'm genetically pre-disposed to mild depression," or "I haven't exercised in a while and I spend a lot of time watching TV," instead, we say, "I'm disappointed because I don't make enough money and my boss is mean to me." And yet, someone in the very same circumstances seems much happier than we are. And somehow, nothing ever happens in our career that makes everything all right forever.

We don't say, "I'm grouchy because of hormones." Instead, we say, "He deserved that outburst. He was being a jerk." Of course, he was the same guy last week and you sort of liked him.
We don't say, "When I dress and act like the people around me, I can feel safe as a member of their tribe." Instead, we think, "I feel good when I'm with my friends."

We don't say, "I have a very complex relationship with money because my parents spoiled me." Instead, we say, "Hey, the bank gave me a credit card so it's okay to buy things that I deserve."
We don't say, "I eat to drown out the way I feel about my mom," instead we say, "Hey, if it's on a salad bar, it must be good for me. And anyway, next month is my birthday."

The external world is remarkably consistent, and yet we blame it for what's going on inside of us. People who think the world is going to end always manage to find a new thing that's going to cause it to end. People itching to be bummed out all day long will certainly find an external event that give their emotion some causal cover. The thinking happens long before the event that we blame the thinking on."
Seth Godin

So all of us have moments when we moan, gripe, make excuses or blame others. Does us it get us anywhere? Really? No. Does it help to give other people a hard time just because you think you're 'right'? No. It just makes you difficult to be around.

Why is it so hard to admit we are fallible? Yes I have a problem with critisism, I can't handle stress well, I'm afraid I'm not worthy enough or to say I deserve and need more loving. Then we don't have to lash out or blame others for a mistake we made or to simply hide something we are ashamed of admitting.
Every time you use your anger or temper with someone else you lose out as it NEVER gets you any brownie points. Blaming others works against you. Have you considered it helps when you decide to hold yourself accountable? Think how come you can't handle a situation or why you react the way you do? It's a funny thing but we rarely do. We tend to point the finger at others because it's simply more convenient to do so.

No comments:

Post a Comment